Why don’t you stop doing the things that you don’t really want to do? You know, the things that you can’t wait to finish, the obligations that you really have to pump yourself up to do – the people you “have” to keep in touch with, the invitations you don’t really want to accept, the requests you say “yes” to, the gifts you give that don’t come from the heart, or the things that you wait until the last minute to do because you dread them.
“I can’t just stop,” you say. “Why not?” I ask. “Well,” you say, “because it’s the right thing to do,” or because “I don’t want to be rude,” or “I don’t want to come across ungrateful,” or “I don’t want people to think I’m a bad person.”
What are the “icky” things you are unconsciously doing in your life?
Your heart knows
While I know that there are responsibilities such as paying bills and showing up to work that we can’t run away from, what takes away our precious energy, and what makes us really feel “icky” are the things we do even though our heart is telling us otherwise. We betray ourselves when we judge this voice to be wrong or ignore it completely.
When we do things to please others, or when we take action just to keep up an image that is inauthentic, or even when we don’t speak up to avoid a confrontation, we move further away from ourselves.
Time is passing you by
You only have one life to live. Tick-tock-tick-tock. The days may drag, but the years are speeding by. Have you noticed? And guess what? Before you know it, another decade will have passed – and then another and another. Do you want to get to the end of your life only doing things for the sake of appearances, for pleasing others, or for the sake of looking “good” to others, and then wish you had enjoyed your life more? Or do you want to get to the end of your life and say “Yes! How great that I lived – really lived a life filled with meaning and purpose.”
It’s not to late to change
Even if you are currently caught up in doing the icky stuff, it’s not too late. From this moment, make a commitment to yourself to ask yourself what your heart says before every future commitment of your time or energy. If something is on the plate of possibility, and you get that familiar feeling in the pit of your stomach when you think about doing it – that is your heart sending you a message.
Your heart is beating with the vibration of your unique self, and it knows what’s right for you, and what you really want. We often over ride this, and when we do so, lose touch with ourselves leading us further away from our purpose. Start with the intent to tune into your true feelings about whatever it is you are doing. Listen to what your heart is saying – and acknowledge your truth. It is not selfish – it is a step towards being more authentic and finding your inspired niche in this world.
So whether you do something you really don’t want to do, or not do something you really want to do – at the very least acknowledge your inner voice of true desire. If you are not ready to change course, at least tell yourself, “Heart, I hear you.” Acknowledge how you feel without judging it as being “good” or “bad.”
Lead yourself to greater meaning
People ask me all the time how to find more meaning in their life, and connect to their greater purpose. Well, one of the first steps towards this is to listen to yourself in this one seemingly small, but very profound way, and most importantly, stop judging how you feel.
If you honor your time and energy, and respect your own desires, the voice of your deeper self will emerge and will naturally lead you to make choices that are more authentic.
Just start with inner awareness, and begin with the everyday small stuff, and as sure as day follows night, you will lead yourself toward greater meaning and purpose.`