When is the juice worth the squeeze? This is most definitely “the” question of the month! I have been asked this question so much lately that there is a good chance you are contemplating the same thing.
As an astrologer, I can tell you that there are multiple planetary themes all causing us to question our choices, our lives, our direction and ourselves in unprecedented ways. This has been going on for several years, but as we move into the final phases of these intensifying cycles, anywhere you haven’t made changes that may be necessary, you will need to dig deep and decide what is the best choice for you to make.
When we are faced with something that has become exhausting beyond measure in the areas of relationships, friendships, expectations, ambitions, career, situations, etc., and we experience more challenge than benefits, we often want out, but hesitate to do so because of various reasons. Perhaps it is the fear of potentially making the wrong choice, looking like a quitter, letting someone down, or not wanting to feel like you “wasted” your time and effort.
Is the healthiest choice to walk away?
Looking at it one way, you can’t pour antidote into poison forever and expect it to continually transform into to something that energizes you. Sometimes the healthiest choice is to walk away. But…when is it time to move on? How do we assess a circumstance that is worthy of the challenge?
We may look at others that quit situations and secretly wonder if they tried hard enough, or stayed long enough to give it a chance to work. In our own case, we may value loyalty, yet sometimes holding onto it can destroy our optimism and joy.
What is the tipping point?
There is no magic formula that gives the answer as to what the tipping point is that determines the “right” end of something. That’s because it all depends on you, your situation, and your life lessons. Sometimes there is yet work to do and lessons to be learned, and it might be too soon to leave. It’s always hard when just at the point of giving up, you see signs of “possibility” showing up, and no matter what, you just can’t abandon ship. If this is the case, just know that the timing is not right until you feel it is right.
Not every battle has a winner
Not every battle has a winner. Sometimes we find all losers because people on both sides are hurt and tired. So, there are some situations, when the best thing to do is to walk away and stop putting your energy towards fixing something that will never ever be well. If in your situation, you have reached a point where you feel you’ve had “enough” – the bravest and most gracious thing to do is to walk away for the ultimate growth and evolution of both parties. By doing so, you free your energy up so you can have more to create a more fulfilling and balanced life.
Where’s your focus?
Sometimes it’s hard to know what to do because we tend to focus on the loss rather than the gain. Here are a few tips to help you assess your situation in a different way.
- What are the advantages of leaving the situation? Make a list of what you can look forward to by moving on. Make another list of what you will miss as a result of leaving. This should give you a better idea of where you are at. Reread the list daily, adding as you think of new things. Which option fills your heart with a sense of excitement? When the potential joy outweighs the pain of the loss, you know which direction to move towards.
- Why are you resisting the change? Is it because you don’t want to cause pain or inconvenience to the party being left? If it has more to do with feeling bad about “hurting” or “abandoning” others, you may be putting others needs over your own. In this case, keep moving towards doing what is right for you, and know that by doing so, you further open up the path for both parties to move to new levels.
- What does your body and heart say? Your brain may lie to you but your body and heart will not. If you are feeling drained, then something needs to change. Sometimes our logic, our mind, our loyalty, our ego, and our “shoulds” rule the situation for so long, you don’t realize it’s time to leave.
Meanwhile, while you are feeling “stuck”…
Most importantly, know that if you are still in the situation, you are getting something out of it. Don’t beat yourself up thinking that you should know what to do already. It takes time to work through layers of “shoulds,” beliefs, fears, habits, etc., and get clear.
The good news is, in time, once you get to the core of it, you will know what is the best choice, and whether it’s to make a change or recommit, it will just feel right. Once you “know, ” and IF the answer is to move on – trust yourself and move in that direction, even if it’s hard, even if others judge you, or try to talk you out of it. If you know in your heart what you need to do, move forward and know that you are moving to a new level of power in your life and the benefits are ultimately for both parties.
When we lose our heart, we lose our way. Knowing this, start by finding your way back to your heart, and your ultimate knowing and power.