Everyday, we make choices. Some choices affect us for hours or days, while others have such great potential impact that the decision we make can completely change the course of our lives. When we are faced with a choice, sometimes we make choices that are not good for us from simple habit.
When we are not clear and certain as to why we are making that choice, we can make choices that we later regret. When decisions are being made, whether big or small, making an effort to be conscious while considering what to do, gives us the ability to change patterns of the past. If you want your life to be different, it’s “simply” a matter of making different choices with a conscious mind.
The next time you are faced with a decision, whether it is a big one or a small one, here are two questions you can ask yourself in order understand what your motivating factor is. Here are two of my favorite questions to ask myself when I am about to make a choice that is doesn’t feel right:
- Am I making this choice to please someone else?
- Will I gain energy by making this choice, or lose energy?
Am I making this choice to please someone else?
Anytime I am asked to do something, and I feel uncomfortable about saying yes, it’s usually because I am saying yes to please someone else. When I ask myself this question, I bring the answer to the forefront of my awareness, and when I clearly recognize that pleasing someone else is the motivating factor, I know I need to dig deeper. Why is it important to please them? By agreeing to what they want, am I releasing my personal power to them and allowing what they think is important to overrule what I truly think and feel? This leads me to the next question.
Will I gain energy by making this choice, or lose energy?
I like to measure interactions based on an “even exchange of energy” – which means that in every exchange, interaction, and situation, I strive for an equal benefit as a result of the exchange – whether it is an exchange of time, energy, money, resources or a feeling of appreciation. We all know how it feels to do something that drains our energy – especially when we do something because we think we “have” to. Using the example above, if I say yes in order to please another, I then ask myself if I will gain or lose energy. If I determine that I will lose energy, as difficult as it might be, I know that the best choice for me is to say no.
Making different choices is difficult sometimes, but if you want to change the results you have been getting, the first step is to make choices with a conscious awareness. It really helps!